Day 6

Thank you Irish Friend of Bill and Scout for your comments and welcome. I really didn't know what would happen with this blog just knew I needed to get my feelings and experience out of myself. Scout, to answer your question, while I have committed to sobriety, I have not yet committed to AA. So no, I have not been to a meeting. I guess I'm taking baby steps. I've got a Big Book and as you can see from my blog am doing a 25 day study of it as posted by Dave on the Yahoo Group AA Beginners Group. I guess right now I counting on the online sipport. I've got a schedule of meetings in my pocketbook so that I am ready if I feel that is the way for me. For today, I feel armed and its empowering to know there is a meeting, a blog, a friend just waiting for me to reach out. I am so grateful that I found this blogosphere.

I did an AA meeting waaaaaay back when I was in college and I think that is when I decided I wasn't an alcoholic. And it has really taken until now to surrender to the fact that I am and to move forward knowing that I cannot control this and need to stop trying. I know that as much as I like the idea of say cracking the champagne today to christen my kayak and that normal people could do that, have a sip and not finish the bottle and enjoy the day, for me, I would drink the whole bottle. In fact, I would probably bring 2 because I would have to share. And if I didn't bring that extra bottle once I started I would do my thing and go home and drink until I passed out.

Anyway, thank you both again. Today is Day 6. No hangover, rested, encouraged, but yes still worried. TRUST. Gotta go, Husband has to teach me how to load the kayak and he has to do it RIGHT NOW:) so he can head on up to Laconia for the biker stuff this weekend.