Getting Ready

Tomorrow we leave for vacation. Today will be a frenzy of work, packing, shopping, etc. We have to anticipate all of our needs in terms of food, entertainment, etc. because there are no shops, theaters, etc. I think it will be perfect. Just us and the ocean. I plan to sleep, read, kayak, cook and just soak up the beauty of the Maine coast. The people who own the home we are renting sound very sweet and we are a test case for them as far as renting their piece of heaven. No pressure!

Last night's meeting was all about Step 4. This is the aunt and uncle group and I appreciated all of their shared experience. In many ways I am looking forward to getting this step done because it will pause for a lot of self reflection which I tend to avoid. It's like, yeah, I know its there but once I name it, it requires I do something about it. I've always been a stickler for self awareness but I haven't done much in the area of self improvement. And I sure I will find my old idea of self awareness is a big hoot.

The other big thing I took from the meeting was caution. I am learning that as many people there are in AA there are that many ways to do Step 4. There are BB thumpers, AWOL groups, worksheets and on and on. I think checking all this out is helping me to realize that I can be comfortable with however I get it done as long as I get it done and am honest with pure motives. That is what I will strive for. What I also learned there and elsewhere in the rooms is that AA is full of flawed people so be careful what you say in meetings and in Step 5. I can be very naive for a woman of a certain age and I tend to attribute pure motives to others. That's why I'm a paralegal and not a lawyer. I live in a fairly small community and the annonymity of this program can get lost. Or at least that is what I'm hearing. So proceed but with caution.

Anyway, my very mean daughter has said we cannot take her laptop with us. So I won't have access to a computer until Monday when she comes up. The kids are joining us on Monday because they couldnt' get the weekend off from their jobs. They both work in the same pizza place so it would be tough plus they both need the money. This will work as me and the Husband and I could use some alone time and they will have the weekend as well as the 4 hour drive to bond as brother and sister. And that is what this vacation's purpose was about. Connection, in more ways than one.