A Gift

Today is the anniversay of my last drunk. It was a Sunday It really was no different than any other day.....I assume that I had been drinking all week as usual and I think on Saturday, while I was drinking, I had decided (yet again) to quit FOREVER..... tomorrow!. Of course Sunday came, I woke up in the morning, sick as dog as usual but determined that today would be the day. By early afternoon, I was in my car and down to the local store to buy "groceries" for dinner. Of course it was just as easy to add the wine to my cart. You know the routine. I self justified, rationalized and in plain english BULLSHITTED my way to the store. And then I spent the afternoon pleasantly sitting on my porch swinging on my swing, reading and sipping away. Feeling better with each sip because the hangover was going away. Although I wasn't really a sipper, I was more of a gulper. I didn't drink my wine out of a pretty glass but usually out of a tumbler normally used for iced tea. I drank away the afternoon with no more thought to my resolve. I made dinner and later we watched the finale of the Sopranos. I remembered it. I didn't pass out. I didn't black out though that was usual for me. Nothing horrible happend except the next morning I was so sick I couldn't face my job or myself. I don't know what happened that morning or why it was different than any other morning. I know it had nothing to do with me.

It was a gift.