September

Well, its that busy time of year again. And now I add meetings to the mix so hence long time no post.

I spent the weekend camping with my girlfriends. Before I left I was a bit anxious as this had been a drinking event for me in the past. Wasn't sure I could handle it. I appreciated the support here. My sponser advised me that I pray about it, turn it over, make sure I had an exit plan, etc. I am so grateful that I went instead of avoiding the situation. I found out that my girlfriends love and support me, falling down drunk or 3 months sober. They knew that this was the best thing for me. I discovered the true meaning of friendship on this trip. And that was because of a power greater than myself. Had I used my own will, I would have clenched my fists as they sipped around the campfire. Instead I had my herbal tea and laughed my ass off. And once again, I learned that my drinking was different than theirs. My not drinking was not the center of attention. I just didn't do it and had some good one on one conversations with those that wanted to talk about it. I just really feel as though the desire to drink has been lifted and I am so grateful. I must admit however that I did smoke a cigarette after we took camp down with the 2 smokers of the group. Not sure what that is saying. I just wanted to do something bad. And it was. It was awful. Glad to be done with that habit!

And now for something completely different.

I just lost a friend who was only 50 years old to cancer. Lovely family, giving member of the community, an excellent example of a businessman, etc. In talking with another friend we agreed that it just SUCKED, that he was gone. My friend was really angry and trying to figure out why. I was able to share with her my feeling that perhaps we are not meant to know why but the peace lies in knowing that it was God's will. I ran into his widow at a soccer game the other day. She looked tired but strong. She looked at peace and grateful for the hugs we offered her. We have no idea what that Gods' Will may be. Men have struggled for centuries trying to figure that out. What makes us think that we should know what that is?

I am grateful:

For my growing faith.
For my daughter who shared her life on campus with me yesterday.
For my son who shared nothing but was home studying last night. Does my heart good.
For my girlfriends some who love to camp and some who would much prefer a B & B:)
That my moments of stress over my totally messy house are getting smaller and smaller.
For marathon watching of Grey's Anatomy now that the 3rd season is out on DVD.