Thursday, March 27, 2008

I Should be Working


Okay, I'm not now. I'm home but the last two posts were while I was at work. Three in one day! Should make up for not posting in a week. Anyway, pretty much since I got sober 9 months ago, much of time at work is spent checking in with my online group, reading and posting. And checking in here at blogdom though I haven't been doing that as much of late. Not so fair to my boss. In fact when I was at a roundup last month I became infuriated that he had the audacity to call me on my cell phone on a Saturday. He needed a password to get into the DOR site to pay his corporate taxes. Not only that he called my house like 10 times in a panic about where I was disturbing my family. Not that I had it or even knew where it was, (it didn't exist, I have nothing to do with his bookkeeping, I had gotten one for a client and he got mixed up.). He gets flustered and needs someone else to do the thinking for him and that is usually me. I'm the detail guy. Later at the roundup someone asked me about my online group and I told them how I check in while I'm at work to keep my sanity and then it struck me. I am doing this on his time. I get angry that he crossed my boundry yet I cross his every day.


It is very clear to me that I am going to need to leave my job. I am a paralegal and my boss is heading in a different direction. The law is falling to the wayside and he is pursuing strategic planning for businesses and wealthy clients. I just have no interest. I can handle the legal stuff and I like it but I could care less about building a business or an individuals estate. And my employer's personality is toxic to someone who is trying to get well. Me. Anyway, just needed to get that out.


I'm trying to stay sober and trying to do the right thing. I should be focusing on my work when I am at work but I am just not interested anymore. And there is less and less legal work to do and more and more "strategic planning." Sounds like I need my own strategic plan.

3 comments:

Michael said...

I guess its pray and listen isnt it, anyway whatever u wanna do I am sure you will deal with it, I get drivers phoning me when Im on hol asking me to leave tickets out for them to load, obviously I cant but I was wondering how I could put a pecial message on my phone just to say i was on holiday before it started ringing???

Anonymous said...

Kathy,

Going through the same thing with my job, spending too much time online while on the clock because I'm just not interested in my job and yes I work for a toxic boss as well who has reduced me to tears recently. It is not their fault, I've changed and they have stayed the same and their left a little bit confused why the woman that use to hold the company together is now falling apart.

Time to change where I work, to a more positive atmosphere! Good luck in your strategic planning!

Maura

Anonymous said...

Just thought I would stop by and catch up with you. Thanks for stopping by to see me. :) I wish I had a job where I could blog all day! Does the time go by fast like it does at home?