Tuesday, April 21, 2009

My Baby's no Baby



My 18 year old is 6'3" tall and I am about to send him off with three of his buddies for a road trip to Montreal. We know why they are going to Montreal don't we? But its Spring Break..everyone is doing SOMETHING and they have come up with this brainstorm. I am trying not to be full of fear and my first reaction to this was ABSOLUTELY NOT! After all, I went to Ft. Lauderdale my senior year and I know what that was about. I always said I was not going to be as stupid as my parents.


But ultimately, he's a man now. He's about to go off to college. He's 18. He can serve our country if he chooses. So I suppose I can let go and trust his judgement. I can warn him that he has a lot to lose, to be smart, to be safe and trust God. That's for me....he's not quite there yet. He has promised to check in frequently...understands that my concerns have nothing to do with trust and everything to do with fear. He can tolerate that. I told him last night that I missed the boy who used to nap in the crook of my knee. That would be an interesting picture now.


I guess I'm beginning the feelings of empty nest syndrome...I just need to look up because if there is an empty nest there are birds soaring......and that's a beautiful thing.

9 comments:

Shadow said...

that cannot be easy for a mother... we want them to grow and become responsible adults, but leave???? yes and no...

Banana Girl said...

I have never been a mother but I know your fear. Prayers are coming your way. Wonderful posts! J.

Annette said...

Yeah, I hear you. Letting go is so so hard. I love the last line of your post. "Where there is an empty nest, there are birds soaring."

Unknown said...

Beautiful post, and oh so true...it's so hard to let go and trust that it will be okay...I will send you prayers and send you love! And no matter what you're nest will never be truly empty!

Love,
G

steveroni said...

J., those four comments above mine are the most beautiful, supportive, and prayerful writings...only a woman (and some men, I guess) cna have such insight into the "empty nest" business.

I recall thinking only "How great, now I can watch what I want on TV--never could for the past 22 years!"...and that kind of thinking.

Now I don't watch TV, I'd rather blog -grin!

A wonderful post. Thank you!

Hope said...

The first time only daughter drove out of the yard after she had her drivers licence I felt like God was having a chuckle. Another thing to add to my list of "There is a God and I'm not it." Previous to that the list included when I went under anaesthetic for surgeries and when I got on an airplane.

Fireman John said...

it's never easy to watch them become
independent; just trust in the values and morals you instilled in him.

Anonymous said...

Love that last line, way to turn it around girl!

Kathy Lynne said...

Fireman John...that's EXACTLY what I worry about...the values and morals of a drunk woman are quite different than the values and moral of a sober one....